What I wanted as an intractable disease patient

What I wanted as an intractable disease patient

What I wanted most when I was 10 years old and developed a rare cancer (osteosarcoma).
It wasn’t a silver bullet, it was.
As a third grader, I was a little more shy than the children around me.
Because of his shyness, he was not good at communicating his thoughts and opinions to the other party.
One day, when I suddenly became a patient with an intractable disease, I created a wall with the people around me and closed my heart.
I was thinking at that time.
That is “loneliness”.
“I’m alone in this world.”
I was so lonely that I forgot that I had an incurable disease.
When I became lonely, I couldn’t hear the voices around me.
At the same time, I no longer feel anxious about the future.
I have no future.
I can’t live in the future.
I can’t live the same life as everyone else.
I’m sure life is like that.
A life that ends in no time.
I was born to experience that “life that ends in a blink of an eye”.
From a different point of view, I realized my life at this moment.
It’s still strange, but I remember feeling a little courage when I felt that kind of feeling in my life.
It’s like being wrapped in something, like being protected.
However,…
But I was shedding a lot of unstoppable tears.
After all, I’m lonely.
Someone please help me.

Anyone is fine
Please help me.
My heart was filled with complex emotions one after another, like the sea that was rippling violently.
And when I noticed, I was asleep.
When I woke up, another feeling was born in me.
that is…
Continue on another day.